DON'T STOP DREAMING.COM

The bible teaches us to write the vision and make it plain, and that those who read it may run with it and tho it trarrys it shall come to past, in its due season it shall speak and not lie.......This scripture taken from the book of the minor prophet Habakkuk speaks volumes in our lives. It demonstrates the power our dreams or vision have on our lives. Everything starts with your vision, with your dreams...you dream what you believe and you believe what you perceive and your perceptions are always manifested in your visions. Joseph's destiny began with his dreams, and because of his dreams he was sent to the pit, the prison and then finally to the palace where he lived his life in abundance. When Joseph was dreaming he didn't base the validity of his dreams on his current situations, because he didn't perceive that his current state was his destined state and because of this his belief wasn't in what he could presently see but what he saw in his visions. So examine your own personal life, I know things don't currently look like what you saw in that dream, what you saw in that vision but you have to have faith in what you saw because your dreams and visions are not subjected to your current situation but your current situation is subjected to your dreams and visions which means the place you are in now has to change in order for you, your life and the things around you to line up with what your vision has spoken. Remember the scripture says it shall speak and not lie. Allow your visions and dreams to empower you to fight through all that you see now. Because what you see now, is just the red tape you have to go through to get to the glory on the other side. You may be trapped in Egypt under pharaohs rule, you may be stuck in the wilderness or in the belly of a whale but if you just hold on to what your vision said, God will be faithful to deliver you into the hands of your destiny and your life shall become the manifestation of your vision. God didn't send you your dreams and visions just as a trailer to the upcoming film called your life. He sent you those dreams and visions to keep you encouraged, empowered and assured that His words shall not lie. God said in his word that if we can't believe him for what He said then believe Him for His works. Those works are in your visions. Back in 2003 when I first received Christ in my life, I had dreams and visions of me being delivered from homosexuality, masturbation, low self-esteem and depression. I had dreams of me writing a book and helping people who were hurting just as I was and now 8 years later, I stand before the Lord, DELIVERED from homosexuality, depression, masturbation, low-self esteem and my book entitled, 'Tears of Deliverance is set to be released in August of this year. So I don't care how your situations looks, just keep holding on to the promise, keep holding on to your dreams and your visions because though they tarry, wait for them, because in due season they shall speak and not lie and your life will be their manifestation!!!!!!

Journal Entry from my book, "Tears of Deliverance"

Journal Entry 6

So much has been happening in my life. God has been blessing and I have been messing. I realized today that I struggle with current issues because I haven’t healed from past hurts. I’m so tired of dealing with low self esteem, sexual desires and just living poorly in its entirety. Sometimes I sit back and wonder does God has a concern for my spiritual well being. I mean the world calls me gay and faggot because my gender behavior doesn’t match those stereotyped for a man. You know what I’m sorry my voice isn’t deep enough, I’m sorry I’m fat, I’m sorry I’m less attractive than other people, I’m sorry I don’t have muscles or a strong physique. I’m tired of having oral and anal sex just to be liked for a moment. I am tired of guys coming in and out of my life with no real friendships. I am tired of having sexual encounter after sexual encounter just to feel some form of emotional attachment. I am tired of having no solutions to my issues and I just sit back and think why?? When I think about my future there is a wife, kids, house and etc. And that’s what I want. That’s what I desire to have but I am so afraid that It won’t happen because I don’t know how to approach a woman. I was never taught how to be a man so I’m 25 years old with the man knowledge of a child. I am so low in self esteem woman intimidate me. I think who wants to be with a faggot. If I see a woman looking at me or people in general I ask myself what’s wrong with me, they must be talking about how gay I look or how fat I am or how ugly I am. My-self perception is so destructive. I m just so tired of the emotional and mental pain I am in daily. I hear of stories of how God performed the miraculous and delivered people instantaneous from and addiction or an affliction and I sit back and ask when is my turn going to come. But yet I am not giving up. Just this morning I had sex with an ex. I didn’t want to but I did it anyway. I felt the condemnation, I felt the sickening of my stomach but I did it anyway. No matter what I decide to do or how I decide to do it when I’m feeling depressed or lonely I turn back to sex. I hate it, I dislike it, and I just want to be normal. I just want to be a man, masculine, attractive and straight. God where is my encounter and where is my miracle. I am not reading my word or praying like I used to. I am tired of going to church and not feeling the presence of God. Am I so filthy that even God doesn’t want to be around me? I am tired of not having any male friends to help teach me the things men are suppose to know and behave. I am tired of living in poverty and barely surviving. I am tired of working at McDonalds for a little over minimum wage and less than 30 hours but in the midst of all this I am still thank for the job and thankful for the money that I do make. My knees are knocked and my feet are slew and God I just don’t know what to do. I barely can explain how I feel. Am I emotional or emotionless? Why did you create me like this, what is my purpose, how will my destiny manifest itself? If I can’t say no to the park on Sundays, adam4adam, craigslist or BGC how can I ever find a wife? I hate myself, I hate my behaviors. I’m 25 still in undergrad, I am not close to being married, I have no real male friends, I have no spiritual support system but God I am still trying. My heart is heavy but it still beats for you. My hands and body are dirty but I still want to serve you. My mouth is unclean but I still want to talk to you. I still want to teach, preach and prophesy your word. My mind is a mess but I still want to see visions and dreams. God when is it going to be my turn? When am I going to be completely healed? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to do? God you have to do something because I’m falling and this time I don’t think I can get back up……..

Perceptions....Perceptions.....Perceptions

In the beginning when God created the heavens and the earth it was all created out of the divine creativity of our Father. However when he decided to create Man, his method changed, his instrument of choice changed. He no longer was using His creativity but He used His perception. He stated, "Let US make man in OUR own image"!!! Then based off of the power of perception man was formed. Isn't it wonderful how powerful something so simple as perception can be in our life and our very existence. Our species was started from perception. Your self-esteem is created from perceptions, your mood is determined by your perceptions. Your relationship is determined by your perceptions. Since perceptions play all these important roles it is very very important that we are operating in the functionality of the correct perception. The wrong perception could cause the wrong things to happen, the wrong perception could alter your self-image, your self-assessment, your self-value most importantly it can alter your world. That's why the enemy is always in your mind because he has to attack your perception of yourself and your perception of how others perceive you and once you are occupied on yours and others perceptions you no longer can see Gods' perception of who you are. For years I struggled from low-self esteem... every time I saw my reflection I was ashamed, I was disgusted!!! I thought look at how unattractive I am, look at how I was created!! So for the first time today, I was surrounded by my reflections, I was in my first photo shoot and with each flash of the camera every thought of my self image came flooding in but this time I felt differently. This time with every thought of my self image I no longer was operating out of my own perceptions. I was seeing myself through the eyes of God. As I looked into the camera, I drifted into a spiritual trance where I started to see myself being photographed, it felts like I was having an out of body experience. As the camera flashed I thought look at those features, look at that big head, those big lips...I am fearfully and wonderfully made. My big head allows my waves to thrive and flourish in my hair, my big lips makes for a beautiful smile, my knock knees and slewfootedness gave me a stronger stance. I started to see that my flaws were created to bring out my features. My perception had changed. For so long I used other people's perceptions of me to define who and what I was and I even used those perceptions to create my own way of perceiving who and what I was. By doing so I was trapped, bound to depression, bound to low self esteem. But when I allowed God to be my image consultant he began to show me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am made from the image and out of the perception of the same God who created the beautiful flowers, who created the magnificent waterfalls and mountain tops. I was created by the same God who created the definition of beauty. If this God looks at me and calls me blessed and calls me the salt of the earth and calls me his child and tells me I am royalty then I must be the best thing since sliced bread. My friend the time has come for you to switch your use of perceptions. It is time for you to embrace your flaws and walk in your unwavering beauty. Your beauty isn't measured by phenotype manifestations. Your beauty comes from your spirit, your essence, your soul because that is what God created, this body is just a natural manifestation of your spiritual reflection. Look in the mirror and smile..overbite, under-bite and even no bite you are beautiful, your are a woman of value, a man of strength and a child of destiny. Stop allowing other people's perceptions to control the way you perceive yourself and please by all means stop letting your tainted perceptions out weigh the perceptions of He who created you. Remember who you are has no relation to your perceptions of who people think you are, You are not a product of their perceptions and neither are you a product of your own, but you are a product of God's perceptions of who you are and that alone makes who you really are far greater that what them or you can perceive.

Smile because no one else can smile better than you!!!! You are the definition of beauty!!!!!

THEY SAID I WOULDN'T MAKE IT.....

SO MANY TIMES PEOPLE MAKE ASSUMPTIONS BASED ON PRESENT SITUATIONS. NO ONE STOPS TO LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE, NO ONE STOPS TO LOOK AT THE POTENTIAL OF A PERSON OR A THING. WHEN  I WAS GROWING UP ALL I HEARD WAS HOW I WOULD NEVER LIVE TO SEE 16, HOW I WAS NOTHING, I WAS GO BE JUST LIKE MY DADDY A NOBODY....ALL THESE FALSE PROPHECIES THAT WERE SPOKEN OVER MY LIFE SEEMED SO REAL AT THE TIME. BUT I HAD A DIFFERENT OUTLOOK, A DIFFERENT MINDSET.  I WAS DETERMINED NOT TO BE A STATISTIC, I WAS DETERMINED TO BE BETTER THAN MY FATHER I WAS DETERMINED TO LIVE WAY BEYOND 16.. I DON'T KNW WHO I AM WRITING THIS FOR BUT GOD WANTS YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT DEFINED BY YOUR SITUATIONS, YOU ARE NOT WHAT PEOPLE SAY YOU ARE, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DIE BUT YOU SHALL LIVE AND DECLARE THE WORKS OF THE LORD. GOD HAS CHOSEN YOU FOR SUCH A TIME AS THIS. YOUR DESTINY IS BEFORE YOU. YOUR VISION IS COMING TO PASS. THE BIBLE TEACHES US TO WRITE THE VISION AND MAKE IT PLAIN AND THAT HE THAT READS IT MAY RUN WITH AND THOUGH IT TARRIES IT SHALL COME TO PASS....SO I ENCOURAGE YOU TO FIGHT FOR YOUR FUTURE, PRAY FOR YOUR PROGRESS, FAST FOR YOUR FAVOR AND WRITE THE VISION AND HAVE FAITH IN THE WORD OF GOD AND KNOW THAT IF GOD SAID IT THEN IT HAS TO COME TO PASS BECAUSE GOD'S WORDS ARE THE POWER OF CREATION, WHEN HE SPEAKS THINGS MOVES, WHEN HE SPEAKS LIFE IS FORMED SO MY FRIEND WHEN YA HATER TRIES TO GET YOU DOWN AND TELL YOU WHERE U BEEN AND WHERE THEY THINK YOU GOING...STOP, LOOK IN THEIR FACE AND SAY LOOK AT ME NOW...I GOT FAVOR!!!!!

Smaller than a gun but deadlier than a bullet!!!!

So many times we have been taught that words don't hurt and that we if we build up our tolerance enough we can let words just roll of our back. But the reality is that sticks and stays may break your bones but words can destroy you destiny. Words are so powerful they have the ability to uplift and destroy a person's sense of self worth. Our bible says it so plain we Jesus teaches us that the power of life and death is in the tongue. To break this down some more Jesus was simply saying the power to create or to destroy can be found in the tongue which produces words. So many times we viciously chump people off and tell our kids how bad they are or our significant others how much they are not satisfying us but then something strange happens, instead of them correcting the behavior it seems to get worst, what we say about them and to them starts to become a consistent part of their personality. People have been called worthless and a waste of space and then as a result committed suicide. Our words have caused bombings, shootings and fights. Our words have broken up families and destroyed friendships and relationships. We have utilized the power to destroy with our tongue and ignored it's most powerful component and that's the power to create. Instead of speaking negatively start to speak those things that be not as though they were. Start speaking life instead of death. Start using your words to elevate, start using your words to encourage, empower and equip yourself and your fellow man. God has trusted us with the most precious gift and that's the power of life, The world was created when God spoke, the storm was ceased when Jesus spoke, demons fled when Jesus spoke, the blinded were able to see when Jesus spoke, deliverance came when Jesus spoke so it's time for us to start speaking life and stop speaking death. It is time for us to tap into the power that has been given to us since the time of creation....Your life is a mess because of the words you say, your child is full of hell because of the words you speak over them. Stop housing garbage in your mouth, stop carrying rejected material in your throat and start to rinse your vocal chords with the spirit of God and fill your diaphragm with the presence of the Holy Spirit so you can start speaking a right now, relevant and resurrecting word....